+9999

+9999 decided that it was time IT intervened. it was time IT did something about my 'love-less" life and therefore, pinged me an SMS that goes like this:

If you Love Someone, then say it. We will help in your words. SMS SUB LOVE to 9999 and get Daily Love Tips. Only in Rs30/month.

It is a sad world and somehow the SMS service providers at NTC have nothing better to do that track down losers like me and remind me about how lonely I am going to die. The degree is unfathomable.

I try to make a joke about it with my dai, my sani, Z in some weird gratifying way.

But, the reality is +9999 probably has not realized that amongst the many random numbers they deliver this message to; perhaps there is a manic depressive who will commit suicide after reading their SMS, or a desperate romantic who will have a go at it only to be dumped, or a working woman divorced out of a bad marriage who will curse them, or a grandfather who does not know how to check an SMS in his mobile. It makes me sad. Somehow +9999 is not so sensitive. Somehow this +9999 will get away with it. Somehow it does not matter to this bloody +9999 that sounds like a moron, know-it-all-who-really-has-no-girlfriend-and-has-no-life (and yes it is a male), who gets paid for this job. He probably goes back home, to his lonely rented one bedroom-common toilet place, and cries himself to sleep. I am sorry +9999, you probably did not know what you were getting into.

For +9999, it is trail and error, or more like a 'hit and miss'; but for us losers at the receiving end, it is life and reality.

But let me tell you, no matter who tells you what, no Daily Love Tips for Rs 30/month is going to land you a life-partner. No. There is something inherently wrong about the idea.

I am not trying to sound cynical (or read like one), but I am telling you that no amount of tip is going to work.

It will probably hit you when you are asleep, or inside a crowded micro, or watching a lame movie with your buddies, or munching through a vegetable burger, or staring at the blossoms in your garden (or in the neighbor's or the community park's) or reading a book, or....oh, THAT is not how it happens? Oh well.